Saturday, October 13, 2012

Painting Creepy Dolls: How it's really done

Posted by: Kate

Okay, Dave, time for me to drink your tears of humiliation.  This is how a creepy doll painting is really done, and not with any of your silly graphite transfer bullcrap either.  Real men paint directly onto the canvas with indelible lines of brazen confidence.


 With each bold stroke I demarcate my boundaries of form and sweep away your crushed self-esteem.


Yeah, that's right.  My drawing's not even accurate.  I spit on accuracy.


Now this is an ébauche,  You see how I just slap that paint up there like it ain't no thang?  Don't worry.  Someday I will teach you.


Yeah, I know you thought you ordered that Vermilion from Natural Pigments for yourself, but it's been hanging out in my tabouret and it likes it there.

 First painting.


Second painting.  BAM.


Shhh.  I know you can't help it, but dry your tears, love.  I can't let you win every time.



12 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well Sir, I believe you have been served.

    ReplyDelete
  3. When are you Canadians going to stop being so mean to the Americans? And I don't mean just David - I mean me too. That doll is going to give me nightmares for weeks.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, this particular doll come to life at night to feed on children's souls. For every soul it captures, it grows in size (which can make painting him a bit difficult)

      Delete
    2. I'm thinking you guys should stop buying your still life curiosities from Lewis Vendredi's antique shop.

      Delete
  4. Here's to slapping up paint "like it ain't no thang"!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Whooo, just catching up with the blog and Kate wins in attitude and finesse. It is a painting smack down. You got the chops Kate and you serve em up with a side'o bacon!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Just found this blog - enjoyment plus laughter + learning = goodness!

    -Kevin

    ReplyDelete
  7. I love this creepy doll challenge!!! You guys are awesome, I'm inspired to do some still life. I think you should put it out there for everyone...see who can paint the creepiest, twistedest (yeah, I know), freeky doll.

    ReplyDelete